Kids And Funeral Services
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You do not have to answer ever question, but do not ignore them. Ask what the child thinks, and always be guided by the child. Funerals do not have to be scary for children, or for anyone. It gives us a chance to say good bye to our loved one and the way things used to be. Funerals are the bridge between good bye and hello. Good bye to what used to be and hello to what is now. A positive experience with a funeral can be a tool to help us all begin to answer the question, who am I now?

We do not lose people. They die, but the love we shared with them can never be destroyed. They are a thread in our fabric, an ongoing influence in our life. We choose how that influence will be addressed, but we will continue to have a relationship with everyone who has made any kind of impact on our life. It is neither "pathological" nor inappropriate for anyone to think, speak, or relate to someone who has died or left us in any manner. Only when such relationships begin to replace all other kinds of associations, does this signal concern. The people we love will always be a part of our life.

We don't stop loving someone just because they died!!

Although painful things do happen, it is not the end of the world for long. It is not possible nor even desirable to eliminate all stressful events from the lives of our children. Children learn to cope with loss by moving through the anxiety they feel with the help of supportive adults. As positive experiences in dealing with loss accumulate, we develop the ability to see ourselves as competent, strong, worthwhile individuals and to see life as a challenge we can meet.

Yes- Loss Hurts!!

We cannot find words to soothe the hurt. There aren't any. We cannot shield our children from the twists and turns of life. We cannot protect them from experiencing life. We can, however build supports and safety nets, not only for our children, but for ourselves as well. That requires love, faith, strength, and support. Hurt and pain have their lessons and we cannot rob ourselves of the richness of the tapestry that hurt and love weave together. To eliminate one from the loom is to break the thread and steal away at the fabric.

HALos's is deeply grateful to Darcie Sims for her willingness to share this info. with others. Darcie D. Sims, Ph.D., CGC, CHT/ Grief Inc./ 9016 Taylorsville Road #181/ Louisville, KY 40299/ (502) 671-0535/ Email: Griefinc@aol.com

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